Run?

by emma | May 30, 2006 | Faith

I went out on the farm tonight, out quadbiking for the first time in a good while. Going through the routine… I pulled on an old jumper, pull on the running shoes, grab the keys, out the door…

And it felt great. Really great. I have no idea why, but when I was riding I had this innate sense of peace, contentment. This quote from Eric Liddle came to mind, who said that when he ran, he felt God's pleasure. Well tonight, I felt God's pleasure.

Pulling into the shed, parking, heading back inside… Circumstances and feelings are so changeable aren't they? Things aren't always easy. I still had my running shoes on at this stage. There was a brief moment were I thought, run. Go out a walk, go a run, just go. But that's the easy way out right? It's harder to stick around. Fight for the things you love. Face your fears. Face your demons. No-one said it would be easy. Quite the contrary. But its the only way to life. Running only wears you down, tires you out and kills the soul.

So stay. Fight. Live.

Lose the junk

by emma | May 26, 2006 | Faith

What's with all these junk surrounding Jesus these days? Do you know what I mean? Take the DaVinci Code for example (and I promise, this is the only mention it will get on my blog!). So many people are going to see it, or have read it, and are now questioning the things of God and of the church. Churches are holding meetings and preaching sermons and discussing in small groups the book and what it says. How much energy are we as a church expending on a fictional book? Now don't hear me wrong, I'm not saying we shouldn't be doing these things, I don't know to be quite honest.

What I am saying is… what if rather than spending all our energy on a fictional book, what if we actually stepped out of our comfort zones and loved some of these people?  What if we didn't put so much money into church building campaigns (again, i'm not saying it's wrong to do that) and spent it on buying the homeless guy breakfast and a hot drink, on giving the single mother a loaf and a pint of milk? What if we spent out time out in the homeless shelters and on the streets and at the soup kitchens and outside the bars where the people are? Have we got it the wrong way round? When Jesus was here on earth, he ate with the sinners, healed the lepers…. he spent His time with the outcasts. He didnt market Himself to get them into the synagogue… he went to wherever they were! What would happen if we stopped spending so much energy and money on our buildings, and took seriously our call to BE the church…

Enough

by emma | May 20, 2006 | Faith

"All of You is more than enough for all of me"

What does that mean? What's it actually mean in practice? We believe deep down that God is enough, but do we really live it? In the dark nights, do I really believe God is enough for everything in me? And if I believe it how is it supposed to alter how I react to things? Why do I still question/doubt/fear?

You are enough Lord. 

Revelation

by emma | Apr 24, 2006 | Faith

I've had a bit of a weird time lately. Been thinking a lot about my future, and especially about marriage, family, etc. I'll be honest… I met this guy a good while ago who so totally captivated me… he was (is?) everything I wanted in a guy and so much more. He was the kind of guy that when you spend time with him or even just are talkig to him on the phone, he sparks a fire in your heart, makes you want to be more like Jesus, makes me want to know Jesus more. His passion is infectious… you couldn't escape it. As far as I was concerned, he was "The One". And yet we are not together. We have never been together. Now, we see each other very little, and hardly ever talk or email. And that's so hard sometimes.

Then yesterday I was reading a blog post, and it was like… BANG! There it is. The guy who wrote it was talking about the break-up of his relationship, and while I never dated the aforementioned guy, it resonated with me deeply. He talked about how even though we may not really believe in "The One", we still want it to happen to us. [Check]. He talked about how you keep noting in your journal the date you are finally free from thinking about the other person… and again. And again. [Check]. He talked about having your prayers come full circle from "God help me" to "teach me some lesson through this" to "surely You have a plan for this pain" to "God help me" again. [Check].

And then came these words:

"We need to wrap our minds around the concept that somehow, some way, we can be happy and whole and full again… I held unto the truth even when the thought of a new love terrified me ."

Wow. Those words hit me like a ton of bricks. I still don't know if this guy is "The One" for me. But I am learning (slowly) to trust in God's truth. Even if he is not, there is still hope for me. I can love again. There is hope.