Hold Them.

Threadbare
I come to you
In truth, only because
There is no where else to go.
It’s said
You hold the words to life eternal
So:
Hold them.

Desperate
I fall to my knees
Nothing left to give
Surrounded by deafening silence
It’s said
You hold the keys to death and hades
So:
Hold them.

Forged in fire

Forged in fire,
I lay the pieces of my life
on your altar
and wait

Wait
in longing.

Waiting for fire,
a fire that consumes
falls from above
and burns the dross away

Wait
in gratitude.

But still,
it burns me, too
burns deeper than I dreamed
a blaze that purifies
still I wait

Wait
in pain.

Then.
You come
with your healing waters
soothing away the agony
and at last
the wait
is
over.

You’re Still Here

She sits on the floor, face in her hands. It’s not the first time we’ve been here; yet I pray it will be the last.

We talk about our days, sharing the random happenings that constitute our daily routines. She tells me it feels like she’s been putting her affairs in order. Telling her story before it’s too late.

I’m not sure how to respond. In some ways she’s right – telling the stories has a finality about it. A sense of closure.

Closure, yes, but not the end.
A page break perhaps.

You can tell your story and let it be a testament to the fact that

you’re

still

here;

that you’ve made it this far and you’re not giving up now. It doesn’t mean you have to go away.

It’s an ending, not the end.

All of us need to tell our stories, to know that our lives matter. Every day we tell them in a myriad of ways: a chord progression in a song; the words in a blog post; a glance across the room that catches someone’s eye, begging to be understood.

In truth, we’re all searching for validation, aren’t we?
Maybe some of us are more honest about it, or maybe we just can’t hide our need as easily.
We all want someone to tell us that we matter, that their lives are made better for our being a part of it.

I wont claim to have any special wisdom, to be anything I’m not.
I’m a broken, messed up girl.
But I’m loved.

There are many days when I don’t feel that, many days when I don’t sense that affirmation. Many days when I wonder if the past will haunt me forever. Many nights when the tears just wont stop.

But I am loved; I am affirmed.
It’s true.
And because it’s true, so is this:

You matter. Your story matters.

Don’t let anyone take it from you.

A New Dawn

God put on flesh & blood & moved into the neighborhood, and with it everything changed…

Whatever your worries,

whatever your battles,

whatever your joys,

whatever your heartaches,

whatever your finances,

whatever your beliefs,

everything changed with his birth.

There is hope,

love,

peace,

joy,

forgiveness,

grace.

A new dawn.

“The people who walked in darkness have seen a great light;
those who lived in a land of deep darkness –
on them a light has shined.”

[Isa 9:2]

Come Undone

Welcome to my world.

It’s 1:14am and I am wide awake, reading blogs and writing. Tapping away at the keys before me. I am writing so much more lately. It’s been an interesting experience so far. I set myself some new goals creatively, for writing specifically, and I’m enjoying it so much more than I expected. It’s difficult at times but it is stretching me so much, and I am thriving on a new challenge.

This song is swirling through my head a lot also…

[Come Undone, by Jackson Waters]

04:01am

awake
from deep slumber
to a world that is hurting
dying
in need
of
hope
raise up a generation
with its
face to the floor
yet our eyes heavenward
open our hearts
to the needs
to the cry
for love
for You

wipe the sleep from your eyes
arise
and go
freely you have received
now freely give
give
until you are spent
until there is nothing left
of you
just Me
Me in you
Me through you
touching them
revealing hope
giving love
restoring
broken
lives