I went out on the farm tonight, out quadbiking for the first time in a good while. Going through the routine… I pulled on an old jumper, pull on the running shoes, grab the keys, out the door…
And it felt great. Really great. I have no idea why, but when I was riding I had this innate sense of peace, contentment. This quote from Eric Liddle came to mind, who said that when he ran, he felt God's pleasure. Well tonight, I felt God's pleasure.
Pulling into the shed, parking, heading back inside… Circumstances and feelings are so changeable aren't they? Things aren't always easy. I still had my running shoes on at this stage. There was a brief moment were I thought, run. Go out a walk, go a run, just go. But that's the easy way out right? It's harder to stick around. Fight for the things you love. Face your fears. Face your demons. No-one said it would be easy. Quite the contrary. But its the only way to life. Running only wears you down, tires you out and kills the soul.
So stay. Fight. Live.
“The mathematician's patterns, like the painter's or the poet's must be beautiful; the ideas, like the colours or the words must fit together in a harmonious way. Beauty is the first test: there is no permanent place in this world for ugly mathematics.”
GH Hardy, A Mathematician’s Apology
What's with all these junk surrounding Jesus these days? Do you know what I mean? Take the DaVinci Code for example (and I promise, this is the only mention it will get on my blog!). So many people are going to see it, or have read it, and are now questioning the things of God and of the church. Churches are holding meetings and preaching sermons and discussing in small groups the book and what it says. How much energy are we as a church expending on a fictional book? Now don't hear me wrong, I'm not saying we shouldn't be doing these things, I don't know to be quite honest.
What I am saying is… what if rather than spending all our energy on a fictional book, what if we actually stepped out of our comfort zones and loved some of these people? What if we didn't put so much money into church building campaigns (again, i'm not saying it's wrong to do that) and spent it on buying the homeless guy breakfast and a hot drink, on giving the single mother a loaf and a pint of milk? What if we spent out time out in the homeless shelters and on the streets and at the soup kitchens and outside the bars where the people are? Have we got it the wrong way round? When Jesus was here on earth, he ate with the sinners, healed the lepers…. he spent His time with the outcasts. He didnt market Himself to get them into the synagogue… he went to wherever they were! What would happen if we stopped spending so much energy and money on our buildings, and took seriously our call to BE the church…
So I’ll wait for you… and I’ll burn
Will I ever see your sweet return
Oh will I ever learn…
It’s never over, my kingdom for a kiss upon her shoulder
It’s never over, all my riches for her smiles when I slept so soft against her
It’s never over, all my blood for the sweetness of her laughter
It’s never over, she’s the tear that hangs inside my soul forever
Well maybe I’m just too young
To keep good love from going wrong
Oh… lover, you should’ve come over
’cause it’s not too late
"All of You is more than enough for all of me"
What does that mean? What's it actually mean in practice? We believe deep down that God is enough, but do we really live it? In the dark nights, do I really believe God is enough for everything in me? And if I believe it how is it supposed to alter how I react to things? Why do I still question/doubt/fear?
You are enough Lord.